Uncomfortable emotions like anger and anxiety can be tough to face, but they’re also opportunities to grow. Learn five simple ways to embrace and work through challenging feelings with kindness and self-awareness.
Have you ever tried to cheer yourself up after a setback or disappointment only to end up feeling even worse? Perhaps you’d fallen out with a friend or failed an important test and tried to drown out the sad thoughts with upbeat music or a feelgood film.
Shying away from challenging emotions is natural and common – people of all ages and from all walks of life do it at different times. But while it might seem helpful in the short term, if it happens a lot, it could make it harder to work out what you think, want, and need in the future.
5 ways to work through challenging emotions
How do you turn and face a feeling that you’re inclined to shy away from? Here are five tips to get you started:
1 Acknowledge & accept your emotions
To feel more comfortable with your feelings, the first step is to acknowledge them. It might be tough to admit that you’re envious of a friend (read more about Exploring Envy here) or you feel sad about a favourite teacher leaving school. Naming the feeling aloud is a great way to accept it.
2 Take time to sit with your feelings
Practise sitting with your emotions for five or 10 minutes. It doesn’t matter if you’re happy, sad, worried, or jealous. Just choose a comfy spot, close your eyes and let the feelings flow.
3 Examine what’s behind your emotions
Sometimes it can be helpful to examine those situations that prompt tricky emotions. Do you feel nervous when going to meet a new friend? Or anxious whenever you hand in homework? Exploring in words or drawings what you felt and when you felt it can help put it into perspective.
4 Talk to someone you trust
Is there someone you can talk to about how you’re feeling? It could be a sibling, a trusted friend, a guardian, or the school counsellor. Sharing your worries can help – the person you speak to might reveal they feel the same way sometimes, too.
5 Find strategies that work for you
Whether it’s going for a walk with a friend, speaking to a trusted adult, or writing about uncomfortable feelings, knowing what works for you can help you prepare for the next time a negative emotion comes along.
WORDS: Lizzie Bestow
This article was originally published under the title In the Feels in Issue 42 – In the Feels. You can get this issue here to enjoy more mindful inspiration.
