When home feels heavy, even a small change of scene can make a big difference. Here’s how to find peace when teens need it most.
Conflict exists in almost every relationship, even in close friendships or between family members. It’s a normal part of life. And, handled constructively, it’s often healthy to air and work through occasional disagreements.
Finding yourself in a household where friction and heated disputes are an everyday occurrence, however, is no fun – even if you’re not the one doing the arguing. It can lead to worry, confusion, and fear that if you leave the house the tensions will reignite or burn with dangerous intensity while you’re away.
It’s a natural response, but always pushing through without stepping away from the heat won’t do you any good in the long run. In fact, it’s essential you make time for yourself and that you do all you can to enjoy this downtime.
WAYS TO FIND CLARITY IN CONFLICT
Making space for yourself is challenging when things are hard at home, but there are ways to navigate this sensitive situation.
FIND SOMEONE TO LEAN ON
If you feel comfortable to do so, let your parents or whoever is in conflict know how it makes you feel. Balbir says that while this might not change the circumstances, it can make others aware that you would benefit from some space and time out of the environment. If you don’t think you can share how you’re feeling with those involved, reach out to a trusted adult who’ll be able to support you and listen to your thoughts and fears.
TAKE SMALL STEPS
At first, it might feel impossible to take time away, but doing so gradually is a good start. ‘Letting yourself take time out from a difficult home situation can come with feelings of guilt, but the more you do it the easier it will become,’ says Balbir. She suggests starting by taking a few hours to yourself first. It could be attending an after-school activity, going for a walk, or visiting a friend for an evening. You can then build up to things like a sleepover and overnight school excursions.
LEARN SOOTHING STRATEGIES
Balbir suggests equipping yourself with some techniques for keeping calm if being out of the house causes anxiety. When worries arise, something as simple as taking a deep breath in and out can help the feelings subside and allow you to immerse yourself in the activity you’re involved in. Another strategy could include letting someone know how you feel while you’re out, so they can help you stop the cycle of unhelpful thinking patterns.
If you need further support, reach out to a trusted adult – maybe an aunt or uncle, a teacher, or the school counsellor. If talking to someone face to face feels too much, visit kidshelpline.com.au.
WORDS: Kim Bansi
PHOTOGRAPHY : Ron Lach on pexels.com
